Happy Cancer-Free Day to Me!

One year ago today, I had a double mastectomy.

I’ve been thinking a lot about it obviously. Going through all the first anniversaries. The original screening mammogram. The diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound. The biopsy. The diagnosis. The MRI. Meeting the surgeon. The oncologist. The Sentinel Lymph Node Biopsy the day before the mastectomy. That sleepless night before the mastectomy. The morning of. The evening after. The days after.

I don’t need to recap everything because it’s all here on the blog. But I can tell you it’s only now, a year out that I can truly see how scared I was for most of a year.

At the time, I thought I was handling it well, facing it head-on, using humor to get me through. I know now I was doing the best I could to get myself through a shocking and difficult time.

That chemo kicked my ass. And it was really only baby chemo. I was genuinely sick from the second treatment in February through the end of July. Even then, I was not better. The chemo didn’t fully leave my system until October, when my hair really started to grow back. My digestive track has healed, but I still have to watch what I eat. I had a hot dog at a Spurs game last week that nearly killed me that night.

I bought an Oura ring a couple months ago and it was like, “GIRL. What is wrong with you?” I still have occasional days of “What the heck?” But the days are more balanced now. And that is a reflection of how I am feeling.

I’m doing monthly group therapy, which has been helpful. We’ve had different kinds of cancer, but talking with others who had similar experiences helps. I’m still in private therapy because she helps me when I need a new perspective. I took a somatics class during the fall that made a world of difference in how I feel mentally and emotionally.

I’m coming into 2026 a different person. Boob-less, sure.

Huh, interesting to me that this is the first time I’ve even thought to mention the boobs. I don’t miss them. It has been an adjustment dressing and there are still some uncomfortable bits (there may be an additional “clean up” surgery this year), but it really hasn’t been a big deal. Maybe a handful of times I’ve thought about them in an “oh” kind of way. And still feeling a bra strap slip is a real thing. I had two weddings in December that I worked really hard to look nice for. I couldn’t figure out why it was so important until after. That it was all part of being at the year end and being another way for me to say “Kiss My Ass 2025, I’m done with you.”

So, yeah, I’m coming into 2026 a different person. But with more joy and hope than I’ve felt in a long time.